Hello, writer! Since you’ve landed here, I’m guessing you might be looking for help with your query letter or submission materials. Whether you’re struggling to get full manuscript requests or it’s your first time querying literary agents, I would love the opportunity to work with you.
As a developmental editor, I specialize in helping querying authors refine their manuscripts and submission materials, and after seeing so many clients acquire representation, I’ve learned that a query’s performance is not always commensurate with the quality of the book. Sometimes the query and sample pages just aren’t selling the story as a whole, and it never hurts to get a second set of eyes from someone with a proven track record.
Notable projects I’ve worked on include DC Traffic Can Be Murder (Kensington, spring 2025) by Sam Lumley, The Muziris Empire (Pan MacMillan, 2024) by Hamish Morjaria, which was featured in this Variety article for the sale of film rights, My Sweet Girl (Berkley/Penguin Group) by Amanda Jayatissa, winner of the ITW Thriller Award and raved about by The New York Times, The Washington Post, and NPR, and the Tradepoint Saga (Aethon Books) by J.J. Blacklocke.
If you’re interested in a full manuscript critique or developmental editing, go here. Otherwise, check out the Query Package options below, and feel free to get in touch if you have any questions.
Query Letter Critique
$50
My query letter critique comes in the form of in-document edit suggestions and feedback inserted as comments using track changes, along with any additional feedback in the accompanying email, with the goal of refining your pitch for clarity, flow, and voice, along with ensuring that it properly introduces your protagonist, showcases your stakes, and offers a compelling hook while striking a balance between concrete and abstract language. You want to give enough details to give a strong sense of your story, but you also want to generate a sense of mystery.
The query critique also comes with a free second pass of your revised query letter.
Query Package
$50 + $8 per 1,000 words of manuscript (up to 10K words)
My Query Package includes a query letter critique along with an editorial assessment of your opening pages in the form of a written manuscript critique, with a focus on character development, plot, pacing, structure, voice, genre appropriateness, and what you can do to increase your chances of hooking an agent.
The Query Package also comes with a free second pass of your revised query letter and follow-up questions concerning the manuscript.
A synopsis edit can be added to this package for an additional $50.
Query Package Plus
$50 + $13 per 1,000 words of manuscript (up to 10K words)
My Query Package Plus includes a query letter critique along with a developmental edit of your opening pages in the form of in-document edit suggestions and feedback inserted as comments using track changes. This is a more in-depth option that provides the same feedback as a Query Package but also offers detailed, line-by-line edits combined with written feedback to maximize the flow, readability, and intrigue of your story’s opening. This has proven to be the most effective option.
The Query Package Plus also comes with a free second pass of your revised query letter and follow-up questions concerning the manuscript.
A synopsis edit can be added to this package for an additional $50.
Query Letter Writing Service
$150
If you’re struggling to write a query letter, or you think your query simply isn’t working at all, I’m happy to write it for you. I’ll gather all the information I need from you and write a draft, then send it back for you to review. This service includes a second pass to work out any kinks. Note: Comp titles are not included (unless I happen to know some good ones).
What My Clients Say About Me
“Getting that first outside perspective on a new project can be a vulnerable experience, but I’m so glad I entrusted my work to Tory. Her feedback was constructive, actionable, and super encouraging. And her ongoing engagement with and support of her clients makes the revision and querying processes so much less lonely than they can otherwise be. Highly recommended!”—Sam Lumley, agented mystery author [Twitter]
“To Tory Hunter for being an early reader of my book and whose positivity and helpful feedback gave me the confidence to finally start pursuing representation for my writing.”—From the Acknowledgements of My Sweet Girl (Berkley/Penguin Group) by Amanda Jayatissa [Twitter]
“I have written five novels and submitted hundreds of queries, but never received any letters of interest. Until I contacted Ms. Hunter, that is. She assisted me with queries to two of my novels. Since then, I have received several letters of interest; I am currently working with an agent for one of the novels. Although I have not landed a book deal, I have received many letters of interest, which lets me know I am on the right track; this could not have been possible without Ms. Hunter’s help. I am finalizing two other books and will definitely seek out her services again.”—Al Bruno, agented contemporary and speculative fiction author
“If not for Tory’s expertise in submission materials, I’d probably still be in the querying trenches. Her query package changes the game.”—Kyle Anthony, agented suspense/thriller author [Twitter]
“Think of Tory Hunter as the Manuscript Whisperer. Bring her your tangled, troubled prose and she’ll cure what ails it. Or come to her for an editorial overview and she’ll analyze your work with honesty, intelligence, and compassion. I was pleased beyond all expectation with the work she did for me. Worth every penny!” — J.J. Blacklocke, agented author of REFUGE: Tradepoint Saga Book One (Aethon Books) [Twitter | Website]
“After eighteen months of fruitless querying, I enlisted the help of Tory Hunter to do a full manuscript critique, along with synopsis. As a result of her suggestions, I received a revise and resubmit request from an agent. Tory worked with me to address the agent’s concerns, and two weeks later I had an offer of representation on my cozy mystery series, which I happily accepted.” — Kate Jackson, agented mystery author [Twitter | Website]
“Tory’s insight and clear explanation really helped me when I was querying.”—Eilene Spear, agented contemporary romance author [Twitter]
Book a Query Critique or Query Package
When you book a query critique or package with me, I’d like to know your querying history, your stats, your goals as an author, and any questions you have about how to strategize in the post-pandemic publishing world, so that I can offer advice and help you decide how to proceed. All my clients are welcome to send me updates, ask my opinion on an agency, and hopefully, one day soon, deliver news with lots of exclamation points—that’s my favorite part of the job.
If you’re interested in any of my query letter critique services, use the form below to get in touch, and let me know what I can do for you. If you’re not sure which option is best for you, I’m happy to answer your questions and make a recommendation. Happy querying!
Tory Hunter Books 