Dear Ms. Literary Agent,
Janie Character has lived her entire life imprisoned in the pages of a novel. The only thing that can set her free is the imagination of an avid reader, but there’s just one problem: Janie isn’t real. She needs a reader’s mind to exist at all, and, confined to the page, she’s powerless to connect with one on her own.
Joe Author wants the best for his beloved Janie Character, so together they embark on a journey to find a fabled literary agent, a rare race of wizards who purport to connect with the very gods of the publishing world themselves, with hope that the right agent might find a publisher for Joe’s novel and finally free Janie from its dusty, yellowing pages.
As Joe struggles to get so much as a partial manuscript request, the realization dawns on Janie that, should she not prove a compelling enough character, Joe might put her in a drawer and move on to his next project. Will Joe’s query letter summon the perfect agent, the gatekeeper who might put Janie Character into the minds of the gods themselves, or will the evil Face of Rejection destroy Joe’s hopes and dreams, condemning Janie to the darkness of a closed book forever?
OMG I WANNA BOOK DEAL SO BAD is a 75,000 word coming-of-age suspense novel set in the throbbing heart of a passionate aspiring writer. It explores the depths of human ambition, the love for the written word, and the inseparable bond that forms between author and character. It will appeal to fans of SYNOPSOCALYPSE NOW and REVISE, RESUBMIT, REJECTED.
Thank you for your consideration. I hope to hear from you.